My Future Adult Life

 I am still in High School and graduation is basically still two years away, but i sometimes can't help but worry and think obsessively over my future life as an autistic adult with Medium Support Needs.

This is going to be a post that is unlike the others in this blog account, but i should let this go. I feel like i need to rant here to let some of my worries go, or something, but i just have an urge to make and to post this after being so inactive for a while. 

(I know no one really sees this for some reason, i am figuring it out i guess.)

I have been in meetings at school with community living agencies so we, me parents and my program support teacher, could discuss the choices for my future. And those choices are perfectly good for me as they can provide an easy way to a routine that i like, but for some reason it's still a bit shocking to think about it. To think about not going to school, not being a kid and being more responsible for myself than i ever was when i wasn't out of school.

I'd still learn something, but that learning of the something will be my last. I'm pretty sure that when i graduate high school, i would no longer be legally bound to go to school as a contract. I can skip out on college if i wanted to, and if my parents allowed me to, i could go to a larger selection of schools than i could go to when i was in grade school. I could also just head off to a job program, a day program or an independent living program and completely forego college for the meanwhile. And that is very adult and also very new to me. It is a bit scary in a way.

But what is the biggest concern, i wonder? My parents both agree it's routine. They and i all, unanimously, agree that routine is the biggest concern for when i graduate from my high school. They have the other stuff relatively figured out, but the biggest barrier to finally having a basic plan at all is how i would recreate routine and a routine that would not pose any problems for me. As not having routine has caused a multitude of problems for me and others around me for a while, and i guess it still does to this day too actually. 

But mind you, we actually do not yet have a concrete plan for my adulthood. For life after i graduate from my high school. We have yet to actually have a family meeting regarding it, but it is promised that we would do it during the summer by my mom. I get that it's only 2 years away, it feels like we would run out of time because we didn't sufficiently plan the years before. It could also because autism and how i love plans ahead of time, and i hate when plans are not made ahead of time no matter how far away the time is from being completed. 

I am thinking a lot of things when it comes to this issue and as i said before, it is really worrying me. Sometimes, it also stresses me out even. It is a rather interesting period that i am right now. 

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